Treehouse in the middle of the lake
by Eox Avanason
Summary: Sorry. I have discontinued this story. I just lost interest in being random. If you want to continue it on your own, go ahead.
1. prolouge

Note: I own not any characters

Note: I own not any characters.

Tree-house in the middle of the lake

Prologue

Cap. Jack Sparrow stood up. He was surrounded by a field of flowers. In the field there was a boy of complete ugliness with huge glasses. He had a scar in the middle is ugly head.

"Hi, my name is Harry Potter," the ugly boy, who was called Hairy Potter, squeaked, "I'm a wizard. I have a really big wand. My wand is bigger than my friend's wand. We compared our wands once. Mine was all," Hairy continued to squeak, " big and stuff. It was pulsing and stuff came out. I had to fix my wand. Are you a wizard? Do you have a wand, I lost my wand. I have nothing where my wand should be. How big is your wand? Mine was 11 inches."

"Where is all the rum when you need it?" muttered Cap. Jack Sparrow.

After Cap. Jack Sparrow had said this, the sky opened up in the middle of the bottom of the field and a fake looking person and a yellow mouse came out.

"Pika-pika-pikachu," said the yellow mouse.

"What was that Pikachu?" said the cartoon boy, "Are you hungry?"

"Pika," said the talking yellow mouse who was called Pikachu. At that moment 'Pikachu' sent a cartoony spark of yellow lightning out of his/her/its red cheeks. That lightning hit the cartoon boy who turned into a pile of ash and from now on will be called Ash.

Another portal opened up and out came a blonde girl.

"Hello little lass," said Cap Jack Sparrow, "I am Cap. Jack Sparrow, the best pirate of all the Caribbean. Might I inquire your name?"

"Oh, sure talk to the girl, but never to Harry Potter, the greatest wizard of all time," squeaked Hairy Potter.

"Pika," said Pikachu, which was meant to say: If you don't shut up I will send a thousand bolts of electricity into your thick skull and hopefully I will fry your brain. Besides this girl is hot and nobody wants to hear how long your fricken wand is. However, everyone took it has "Pika."

"I'm Buffy," the girl responded. "What the hell happened? One minute I'm banging spike and the next I'm out in this field."

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 1

Note: I own not any characters

Note: I own not any characters. And I lost the game by the way EPIC fail.

Tree-house in the middle of the lake

Chapter 1

The first chapter

"Oh Harry," said Ginny Weasley said to noone, "I want to stroke your wand. Harry shake my hand really hard. Damn it where are you??"

Katara suddenly popped into existence.

"What the hell, I'm supposed to be on Avatar not in some stupid Fanfic written by some topless nerds who will probably make me shake hands with Hairy Potter."

"What??" exclaimed Ginny, "Harry is my man, besides, you didn't say his name right. It's Harry not Hairy."

"I said Hairy," said Katara, " and I can't help the fact that the Authors are sick as Hell."

"I am not," I said, "Anyway I have a fast forward button so I will skip this conversation."

-I fast forward-

The sky opened in the middle of the sky and a heavenly light fell down upon the crowd. And out of that light fell the most perfect person ever.

"Bch," Jesus Christ stated. " Fck you Dad!"

HAHAHA JUST KIDDING JESUS IS TO PERFECT TO SWEAR IT WENT MORE LIKE THIS.

"Heavenly sword," Jesus Christ stated. "I forgive you father. After all he who forgives-"

-The author of this chapter decided that he is too lazy to press tab and will now just start with quotes-

"Shut the frick up!" Katara and Ginny exclaim at the same time which is actually quite hard to manage but they somehow did.

"I'm Jesus," said Jesus.

Then another portal opened up and Angel from his own season one of Buffy the Vampire Slayer popped out but he had all the knowledge of the other seasons. Wow… that was a really lame sentence. I do not think I, your god, should be able to write like that. Anyway angel popped out and he was all like WTF mate. And then it went all dark because Angel is a vampire and I don't want him to die right away. So the second group who were not in a flowery field like the last group was all like what the st and then the stars dimmed and the chapter ended so they couldn't do anything.


	3. Chapter 2

Note: I own not any characters

Note: I own not any characters. This is the most boring chapter ever created it is just an introduction of

DA DA DUM

Group 3

Tree-house in the middle of the lake

Chapter 2

The chapter where team 3 joins the fanfic

Two people were inside The Skanky Mattress drinking Dry Lagunitas.

"So," said one, "Do you have zombie insurance??"

"No but I do not want any, zombies aren't real." The other said as a matter of factly. At the exact moment he said this he was eaten by a zombie. He died a painful death. The other guy who we will call, Zombie-man, pulled out a shotgun and shot the zombie. Too bad. Also at that moment the door opened and James Bond I walked into the bar and was all like, names Bond, James Bond. At which point the bartender made his drink.

"Would you like to by some zombie insurance?" asked Zombie-man.

"Yes," said Bond, James Bond. And then he bought some.

They talked for a longer time but I will make this a short chapter so I will fast forward.

-I fast forward-

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-Sht it is broken-

-Pause-

-rewind-

-pause-

-play-

The door to The Skanky Matress opens again a guy in a spider suit. The zombie guy shoots him.

"I hate spiders." Said he.

Then the roof was lifted off and Temeraire lands in the clearing just by The Skanky Mattress. He peers his head over the wall. Also neo from the matrix comes in. he just stands there because he is Neo. Then they all sit at the bar drinking Dry Lagunitas.

-Chapter Begins to fade-

"Wait," I shout to myself, "I haven't finished."

-Chapter is completely dark-

"Aww shi"

-Chapter cuts out completely-

Please tell me how much it sucks there will be more. Tell me what charecters from what tv shows, cartoons, books, movies, ect. You want.


	4. Chapter 3

Note: I own not any characters

Note: I own not any characters. Hey people who actually manage to make it this far please comment and tell me more characters to add. I am a level 20 master chief. Back to group one.

Tree-house in the middle of the lake

Chapter 3

More junk

Buffy pushed her hair back and tied it into a ponytail. She had done this several times now because she was stuck inside the flowery field. Cap. Jack Sparrow (whose name I should shorten to Cap. JS) stumbled about drunkenly despite the fact he hadn't had anything to drink for several hours. Hairy Potter-

"Hey, Me name is Harry not Hairy will you please stop calling me that," said Hairy Potter, "It hurts my feelings."

"No," replied I, your god, "I will continue to call you Hairy."

"Btch," said Hairy.

Anyway, Hairy Potter was soaking his head in some ice cold water because he is stupid and he will be mute until I give him something to say. Pikachu was chasing some mice wondering if he/she/it had a wand, a portal, or both. Then something suddenly happened because something does suddenly happen in things and places that things happen suddenly and so the suddenly happening thing suddenly happened in a way that it would if it was to suddenly happen. And back to the story: something suddenly happened and it made them all turn around because for some reason they were all facing the opposite way of the suddenly happening thing. And when they turned around to see the suddenly happening thing they saw nothing-

"That's retarded. We should see this suddenly happening thing," Buffy the Vampire Slayer said.

"Pika-pika," agreed Pikachu.

Cap. JS continued to stumble about repeating to himself, "Where has all the rum gone?"

Hairy Potter stuck his middle finger up and nodded. His head was wet for he had only recently stopped soaking his head.

Anyways back to what I was saying. They couldn't see the object because I don't know what the object is. Now that I am back from breakfast I decided that the object should be a tennis ball.

"Tennis ball," exclaimed Buffy, who is the chosen one. "That is the object that took you twenty minutes to decide on. I mean why would we look at some tennis ball? Even if it, the tennis ball, magically fell out of the sky that is a pretty lame object."

-A magic tennis ball-

"A magic tennis ball? Giles is more creative than that and he is some boring old British dude. I mean come on," Buffy continued to say as if it would make me change my mind. So the group stared at the tennis ball and it opened up and revealed a magical light. This light fell upon the team and they were sent into Narnia.

-Ha ha ha. Now my beautiful plan that I have not made is falling into place.-

To be continued……Someday…….When I get to it……

Please suggest characters for groups 4-Infinite, by the way they are groups of 4.(if you cant count.)


	5. Chapter 4

Note: If I was to claim to own anyone I would probably be hung

Note: If I was to claim to own anyone I would probably be hung. So I claim not to own anyone…. Except the zombie insurance guy. By the way… I have no clue about the direction the story is heading. I'm thinking right but I'm not sure, it could go left. And now

Tree-house In the Middle of the Lake

Chapter 4

The chapter that comes after chapter 3

Petty Officer Master Chief swore. Or at least he thought he swore. He didn't actually swear because 1) he doesn't talk much and 2) he would get scolded for swearing because the voice inside his head, which's name was Cortana, would yell at him. Anyway, the reason he thought about swearing was because he saw nothing. I mean he did see something because he wasn't blind but it was not what he wanted to see. He wanted to see some aliens because it was his job to find and destroy aliens, however all he saw was desert.

"You seem quiet," Cortana stated.

"Aren't I usually quiet?" questioned Master Chief.

"Err, yes but normally you cuss when you don't see anything but desert," said Cortana, "and I do grow bored not being able to scold you."

A portal opened up and a small Italian plumber popped out. He was wearing red overalls and was slightly fat. He was also very cartoon-ish.

"Mama-mea," said the plumber. Then he said some things in Italian that I cannot spell but I will leave it up to Italian speakers to make up what he said.

Master Chief raised his weapon. Then he discovered that it was out of ammo.

-That is called a plot element or something like that. It is something I purposely put in there to add interest and to keep Mario from dying right away.-

"Fck."

"Hey," said Cortana, "Don't make me rinse out your mouth with soap. You shouldn't use such dirty language."

Master Chief rolled his eyes and walked over to Mario, the Italian guy. Another portal opened up. A boy in all green fell out and he had a sword and a shield. He didn't talk because I don't know what he sounds like. He just picked up his weapon and walked to where Master Chief and Mario were standing. His name was Link, for reasons unknown. He continued to stand there with MC and Mario. They all just stood there until another portal opened up and released Chuck Norris.

The four characters continued to stand there silent. Chuck Norris acted buff, the way he does because he is Chuck Norris. MC acted like somebody who almost single-handedly took out an entire alien race. Link acted like somebody who repeatedly got a weapon called the master sword. And Mario jumped up and down like he tended to do.

"You all have been called to Narnia," I said.

-I drop the magic tennis ball-

To be continued…

Please comment on this. I am running out of characters. Last few chances to submit characters starts now.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I disclaim to claim anything I dis.

Note: Before we begin, an actual conversation:

"Haha, you has been flowrd."

"**Aw, man**."

Tree-house in the Middle of the Lake

Chapter 6

The Final chapter, just kidding

Zombie-man stood the way most people in bars stand, drunkenly. He walked, wait no, he sauntered outside the bar. He stood outside for a very long time, at least fifteen minutes, staring at a tennis ball. He poked three times and continued to stand and stare. He then decide that it wasn't important and he walked back into the bar.

"Did you see anything?" asked Neo.

"No," said Zombie-man.

"There was nothing important?" inquired Temeraire

"Yes," answered Zombie-man.

"Yes what," Neo questioned.

"Yes, there was nothing of interest to me," Zombie-man replied.

"But it is possible that there is something that one of us might find interesting?" Bond wondered aloud."

"Yes," Zombie-man-stated, "that is very possible. However I find that very unlikely."

"Really, I could think of hundreds of things that could keep me entertained. Anything that points me too, near, above, under, and beside Cap. Laurence," Temeraire qualled, "or at the very least, anything that points me to England."

-Jeezo. Will these people hurry up I'm getting bored.-

"I thought we were in England. That's is the only place I can think of that would have a bar called 'The Skanky Mattress,'" said Neo.

Temeraire huffed.

"I believe you are talking about Ireland," Zombie-man corrected.

_-Shame on your characters. They are ignorant and racist. I should sue-_

-Who are you?-

_-Who am I? The question is: who are you? Ah, I can see a blank look on your face. I shall introduce myself. I am you. But I am not **you;** I'm you pretending to be someone else. Oh, and by the way, I believe your characters are talking about California.-_

-And you call my characters racist. Ha! What was that about America, rac-

_-Yea, but it doesn't count. Nobody likes America, especially California. Retard-_

-I don't think I like me-

_- Get over it-_

There was silent silence for at least the amount of time that it was silent. And what filled that silent period was nothing but silence.

_-Duh-_

-Hey, I thought you left. Damn-

_-No, I'm going to be with you until the end of the fanfic-_

-Oh, did you bring any food-

_-No. I have cards though-_

-Ok-

The door to the bar that was in the middle of nowhere opened. And into the bar stepped… No, rolled a tennis ball. The tennis ball rolled to a barstool and hopped up onto the comfy seat. It ordered a Dry Lagunita and when its drink was in its, ummm, hand it hopped off the stool.

"Am I drunk?" three of the four members wondered.

"Yes," replied the Magic Tennis Ball.

"Oh," they said.

"But it is ok because you are all in a bar and this is what people who are in bars do, they get drunk," stated the tennis ball.

And this made sense so it was good.

-Ok. Enough chitchat, tennis ball: do your magic light thing that you do. Hey other me, you want to go with them-

_-I have a name. It's Fizzy-J. And no, I don't wanna go-_

-Damn-

_-Hey-_

-Shut up, watch-

And the tennis ball revealed the magical light which brought them into Narnia.

_-Isn't it illegal to use the trademark of something that you don't own-_

-No I have a disclaimer-

_-Oh-_

Ok people, read and review. And tell me how much you hate, _he means_ _love,_ Fizzy-J

Next time on Tree-house in the Middle of the Lake:

"Oh Jesus, we love you!"


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters, though it would be nice. Wait, I own Fizzy-J,_ YOU_ _DO NOT,_ yes I do, and Eoxavanason.

Tree-house in the Middle of the Lake

The seventh chapter

"Get away, you spawn of Satan. You unholy unholy-thing. You anti-biblical creature. Admit you are the right hand of Satan," Angel exclaimed at Jesus.

"I am not Satan, I am the opposite and I shall prove it. Let me heal you. You fucking freak." Jesus replied.

"Ow, man that's hurts," Angel started to cry. "I mean really, calling me a freak. It's not my fault, my father was abusive, and I was drunk… and there was this really pretty lady."

"Oh, I understand. Hey, howzzabout a 'Bud light'," Jesus said, opening a bottle of bud light. Jesus stared at the 'camera'. "Bud light, it has that good refreshing taste of regular Budweiser with half the calories."

Angel walked over to Jesus and held out his beer. They clinked the bottles. Then Angel spoke, "Wow that is good. It cures my sadness right up. And it has that mmmm taste with only-"

Jesus spoke, "Half the calories." Music suddenly started to play and everyone partied.

**Three hours later…**

-_Wooo. Damn Eox, that was a good party. Of course, I am a better dancer so no wonder everyone likes me better.-_

-Likes you better!! Have you looked at the poll I put up recently, 100 of the voters say I am better-

_-And it also says out of one vote. And that vote was you, I watched you. In fact, I am going to vote for myself right now-_

-And…-

_-I want my own fanfiction account. I can't vote with yours since you already voted for yourself-_

-I smile and laugh at you. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha-

_-and I punch you in the nose. HA hahaha-_

-Ow, what was that for. Great now my nose is gonna bleed-

_-Should I write the rest of the chapter-_

_-_No. Ay cahn wright the rest ove teh chsaptor-

_-Uh-huh. Fine but I have dibs on the next one-_

Ginny the Weasel-

"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!!" she glared.

-uhm, uh, kshutuhp-

"Ketchup? You are not making any sense"

-AY SAIHD KSHUTUHP NOT KATSCHEP-

"Oh right," Ginny rolled her eyes.

"Oh, let me heal you. I will do it for no fee, and it will only be out of my generosity. For I am insanely kin-," Jesus almost got to finish saying said.

_-He won't let you go, even if you do so-_

"Oh, crapola" Jesus said, finishing his beer.

-Lohk arh you guhys in nahrnea yeht-

"umm, Narnia?" the four of them asked together.

-Ihl tacke zat has a no-

A tennis ball rolled into the area that they all happened to be standing in. It glared at the four.

"Wait, how can it glare?" Katara pointed out, "It's a tennis ball."

- KSHUTUHP-

_And Katara kshutup._

-No, Fihi jay bahd. You doh noht geht toe wright-

And Katara shut-up. Then the tennis ball opened up and released a magical light.

"It doesn't have a wand," Ginny stated. "how can it do something magical without a wand.

Angel giggled.

"Hey, what's so funny, vampire? Why don't you go poof, turn into a bat, and fly away?" Ginny exclaimed.

"Only Dracula can turn into a bat. Did you ever watch the first episode of season five of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?" Angel said. "Besides you said **wand**!"

Jesus and Angel burst out laughing. The girls just sat there confused.

Jesus tried to explain, "You see, hahaha, a wand, hahaha, could relate to, whahahahaha, a man's, hahahahahahahahahaha!"

"You two guys are so immature. Come on Ginny, let's go make out," Katara said.

"Oh, can I come?" Angel's eyes went wide with excitement.

"No, only people who act their age can come," Ginny replied.

"Well, that is kinda hard for Jesus and I. You see we are both dead… well undead," Angel explained.

And then the tennis-

"Well, only people who act the age they look can come," Katara shot.

Ball opened up and revealed-

"Well, you're ugly," Angel shot back. Several gasps were heard.

A magical light that-

"Oh no, you didn't," Ginny said.

Started to-

"Oh yes he di-id," Jesus said.

Absorb all that-

"Oh man you are in for it now. Get me some water. It's bending time," Katara said.

Was within-

"Oh, girl, you are so dead," Angel said, turning vamp.

Range including-

"Well, lucky for me you already are," Katara stated, preparing a whip of water.

The four dildos.

"Hey, Eox or whoever you are, STFU," Jesus said.

And they all were sucked into Narnia.

-Hsere zat fihi jay. Siwence-

_-Just end the damn chapter already-_

-pihcky, pihcky-

And the chapter, the seventh chapter, ended the way all chapters end, with words.

Ok, read** AND** review people. I mean really, I only have three reviews. That is just sad. Oh and next time on Tree-house in the Middle of the Lake:

_-I tie Eox up and write my own chapter. MWA HA HA HA HA HA-_

-QUWAHT?-

_-Nothing, nothing at all-_


End file.
